Morning Already?


So another day is upon me.  I lay in bed for a few moments enjoying that hazy space between want to get up and have to get up. My miniature tiger lay perched over my right shoulder, sending a gentle vibrational hum through my frame. The television I fall asleep to is still on and pushing snippets of the early morning news into my mind. I am not completely coherent.  I don’t want to be coherent yet. I want to lie in bed and enjoy the fog that precedes full cognizance.

Not Happening.

My cell is laying there in recharging bliss unaware that a friend is 10 blocks away and furiously pounding on her touch screen. She did it, she pushed send. That was the end. I jumped, naturally, rolling towards the bedside table. Apparently this was not to my jungle cat’s liking. He expressed his annoyance at my deigning to move by laying all 10 of his front claws into my shoulder. I am now the proud owner of a polka-dot reminiscent battle wound. That’s gonna leave a scar I’m sure.

I wanted to bark out a frustrated sentence expressing my aggravation. I wanted to remind him that I buy him that fancy cat food, which is made from the exact same stuff as the cheap cat food. I wanted to explain to him that I was the one with opposable thumbs and then yell how we’d see how he got back in the house when the sun was at full peak searing through his ginger colored coat later this evening. I wanted to do all that but I didn’t.

“Stop! The world is on fire! Save yourself!” the message read. Holy Begeezus! Where do I keep the extinguisher? Oh, right… I don’t have one. It’s on that list of mandatory things to get that I never get. Okay, the text didn’t really say that but after getting into a cat fight upon waking and realizing {yet again} that I need to buy an extinguisher, it should have. I glanced up to see his fleeing figure. He stopped for a moment to look back at me, those copper eyes asking me why. I decided in that one nanosecond that the person who had texted was evil. Yes, evil.

Considering my now ex-friend had ceased to exist to me, I slammed the phone back down on the table. Alright, I didn’t physically slam it down; I don’t want to spend the money to replace it. In my mind; however, I jack hammered that phone right through the light pinewood then trudged through the house in search of fuel.

My dear hubby is ironing. I shake my head in disgust. I loathe the iron and all things associated with ironing, including but not limited to, the ironing board and starch. I’d rather find a new outfit than iron a wrinkled one. I make it to the kitchen after picking up littered cups and paper towels along the way. This is my hubby’s way of saying, “Good morning love of my life. I have left this trail in the hopes of reminding you of the path to the coffee maker. You’re welcome!”

Isn’t that charming? I deposit his “bread crumbs” into the garbage and do a ballet worthy spin towards black beauty—the coffee pot. “Oh! How considerate he is!” I say to myself as I notice he has left his dearly beloved a little less than half a cup of fuel. Just enough to piss me off because I now have to make a new pot, which means I will have to be teased by this partial cup as it brews. I will then, to my dismay, actually have to peel my posterior from the velour-covered, luxury, davenport to pour a real, official, just-made, full cup of coffee.

I know what you’re thinking. You are empathizing with my plight. Right now you are cursing the Gods, screaming, “Why her? This is so unjust!” And you know what? I am right there with you, I screamed those exact words myself this morning. Well, I didn’t scream them but I am nearly positive I thought them.

 To ease your worry, please know that I did in fact get up and pour myself a full freshly brewed cup of coffee. It was fantabulous; as I had added an extra two, more than needed, heaping teaspoons of grounds to the filter. A genius move on my part, don’t you agree?

The genius in this idea gave me that extra zing I needed. I flipped the laptop open and began my usual task of finding an inspirational quote and picture to be my day’s inspiration. It didn’t take long, the force was with me. Good ‘ole Yoda. What a wise green man. The morning’s attempt to sabotage my day was immediately derailed by this all-knowing Jedi Master. Eight words. Can you imagine?

I’m sure you want to hear these eight words. The simple, yet powerful, message they convey was enough to put this vexed female into motion and set my intention for the day. I was tee-totally blown away by this message so be prepared. Are you ready for this? It is a revolutionary concept so take a moment to process it. Okay, here goes.

Do or Do not. There is no trying. ~ Yoda

See? It’s snappy, simple, and inspirational. May the force be with you and me both this day.

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